Why they do what they do, and how to respond with compassion and calm
Behavior is communication
"Every behavior has a reason. When someone with dementia acts in ways we don't understand, they're telling us something they can no longer say with words."
People with dementia aren't trying to be difficult. Their brain changes make it hard to communicate, process information, and regulate emotions. Understanding the "why" behind behaviors helps us respond with patience instead of frustration.
Short-term memory loss means they genuinely don't remember asking. Anxiety or uncertainty can also trigger repetition, they're seeking reassurance.
"I already told you!" or "Don't you remember?", this creates shame without solving anything.
Often triggered by overstimulation, pain, fear, or feeling out of control. They can't express what's wrong, so frustration explodes.
Don't argue, correct, or try to reason. Don't take it personally, it's the disease, not them.
May be looking for something familiar, trying to fulfill a past routine (going to work), boredom, restlessness, or responding to an unmet need.
Don't lock them in a room, this increases agitation. Don't leave them unsupervised if wandering is severe.
Confusion and agitation that worsens in late afternoon/evening. May be related to fatigue, low light, disrupted body clock, or overstimulation from the day.
"You stole my wallet!" When memory fails, the brain fills gaps with explanations. If they can't find something, someone must have taken it.
Don't take accusations personally. Don't try to convince them they're wrong, logic doesn't work here.
Visual hallucinations are common in some dementias (especially Lewy body). The brain misinterprets what the eyes see.
When behaviors are challenging, use DICE: